A single malt in one hand, and an Edenharts pipe puffing in my other hand, I was told by a mate of mine, that he does not have the ability to hate! It is something I do share with him, seeing that I have most of the other sins and shortages of known man. While it seem to be something small, it is really huge. You see, hate is baggage, and the more baggage you carry, the more difficult live becomes.
If we like it or not, hate is part of life! Some people control it by making it non-entities, they move these deserving people to a place where they neither think nor care about them. In fact these people are dead to them. This can work for some of us, but not for everybody. However, what is extremely important, that we need to address baggage we carry.
I make it easy for myself .In life there is only to kinds of people, emotional givers and takers. Givers cannot stop giving, they give all that they have, deserved or not .What they give is not always appropriate, neither is it politically correct, and sometimes it can even be in bad taste. However what is important, is to give love un-conditional. I really do belief, that if you have hate in your heart, you will battle to have the ability to really love. You see your psyche will not be able to give itself, if it is hold back by a small bit of baggage. You are wasting your time!
Fuck knows, baggage is so easy to collect. Sometimes it feels that people aspire to make me hate them on a daily basis (lol), It needs to be handled .I hear a lot, “I do not hate a person, but I will never forget what he did to me” – baggage! To me the most damaging baggage, is the oldest baggage, from days when you were a child, to partners that used you, to business acquaintances that stole from you. The list is un-endless in its severity and its weight, and please, let’s not forget how we hate ourselves, the most debilitating, scary hate there is.Well, here is a news flash, when you keep on hating people:
• Most of the time , they do not even know you hate them
• While you energize them , you drain yourself
• Most importantly you cannot love un-conditionally
• The baggage become too heavy
• It will start to make you physically sick
• At this time you are already mentally exhausted
• This manifests itself in mental problems
• Your actions becomes strange to yourself
• You forget who you are
• You were a giver , you are changing to be a taker
At this point, you will probably want to say to me. It is easy to talk or write about , but it is very difficult to change. I want to differ from you, letting go is much easier than you think. It is conscious decision to decide:
• It is time to let it go
• Make a note in your brain about the lesson you learned
• When you see the person be friendly
• When you find yourself thinking negatively about the baggage , tell yourself verbally ,”nobody is worth it” , and force yourself to think about something else
• Never speak badly about your baggage
I promise you, you will feel a physical weight falling of your shoulders. The freedom of not having baggage is exhilarating, and you will feel much better. Especially when you start forgiving yourself! I will not lie, sometimes I still think about my pathetic, cruel actions against people, and I am ashamed of myself. I force myself to think about something positive or different in my life. It is not that I have forgotten the lessons of my actions that will stay forever. But all of us need a break, the most important thing is to give yourself one. I promise you, whatever you have done in life, somebody has done something more horrific.
As soon as the baggage is gone, UN –conditional love and goodness will be able to form part of your life. You think you are a good, partner, mate, spouse, father, mentor etc. After throwing off the baggage, you will feel, how to do it properly.
Does this mean life will be all honey and flowers, of course not, but at least you will really taste it and smell it for the first time! I just wish getting rid of my “fat gut” was that easy! But I do love myself!